In the past, relationships began as unions to join countries, bringing together two individuals for no other purpose than to form alliances.
Eventually, we evolved to picking our own partner, which was mostly driven by physical desires. Unresolved emotions interfered with these relationships, as physical desire alone was not able to maintain healthy relationships.
Relationships 3.0, is a Co-creative partnerships and are based on emotional and physical energy joined between people who are elevated above and beyond their emotional pains (emotional intelligence) and are now ready to express joy and creativity together as a team!
While working together toward the common goals, each retains their individual unique traits, abilities and goals that are supported by our partner.
It’s possible to evaluate your relationship to recognize areas for improvement, as well as recognize areas of strength! Contact me today to learn more!
The *Relationship Checkup is comprised of 5 sections, each partner answers their own set of questions.
Infidelity refers to a fracture within a committed partnership, a partnership based on trust and mutuality. Any relationship outside of the committed partnership can be considered infidelity....any investment of time, money, energy, etc. that is taken away from the committed partnership.
Beyond the damage to the committed partnership, Infidelity may also involve implications of cultural, religious and legal aspects. Sexual infidelity is rarely about sex! Typically, what is sought after is something missing in their own life - a sense of self-worth, relational issues, self-identity, self-care, and an understanding of moderation.
Secret money: incurring debt that partner or significant other is unaware of, and yet responsible for. Hiding funds from your partner or significant other.
Personal Information: sharing intimate details with someone outside of a committed relationship, in the attempt to gain outside support.
Online: typically an additional element of intimate information and/or visual stimulation involved.
Affairs: an infidelity that denotes an affectionate relationship that may or may not include a sexual relationship.
Sexual Liaisons: an interpersonal interaction entered into expressly for the purpose of sexual satisfaction; it can be for the satisfaction of one or both parties.
Sexual infidelity is rarely about sex! Typically, what is sought is something missing in one's own life - a sense of self-worth, relational issues, self-identity, self-care, and an understanding of moderation.
History of Discernment Counseling
Discernment counseling was developed by Bill Doherty, as part of his work at the University of Minnesota. While it is common for couples to go to therapy with one partner leaning toward breakup or divorce and the other hoping to stay together, there have been few techniques specifically designed for such couples. Discernment counseling was developed specifically to help people in these types of relationships, who are often referred to as “mixed agenda” couples.
Theory of Discernment Counseling
While not considered a treatment, discernment counseling can be seen as an assessment process that helps partners determine the next steps in their relationship. In discernment counseling, couples consider three possible options: ending the relationship, establishing a 6-month period in which both partners commit to making the maximum effort to save the relationship (often while participating in couples therapy), or postponing the decision.
There are four core questions that are asked of couples during the initial session:
The coach meets individually with each partner to discuss their feelings and agenda. Afterward, the couple meets jointly with the therapist again for the conclusion of the session, and the therapist/coach summarizes and arranges another session if both partners want one.
Discernment counseling differs from other types of couples counseling in a few important ways. First, the goal of this type of counseling is not to solve relationship issues or concerns but to determine whether any problems are able to solved. To help couples make a decision, a discernment counselor/coach may spend more time individually with each partner rather than meeting with both at once, as is typical in couples therapy.
An additional difference between discernment counseling and other types of couples counseling is that discernment counseling is often brief: it typically lasts from one and five sessions.
"The difference between a codependent relationship and a healthy one is the same as the difference between compromise and giving up on yourself.
In a healthy relationship, you are able to find a resolution to your differences that works for both of you. And this is without one person consistently giving up on their needs or desires." Read full article by Cosmo Luce.
"A codependent person is an individual who develops patterns within their relationships where the codependent individual has a one-sided relationship with another person. In these relationships, the codependent individual ignores personal needs and suppresses emotions in favor of the other person in the relationship."
Copyright © 2007 - 2021 Quantum Living Psychology - All Rights Reserved
Associated with Psychology Today,
* All services provided as Transformational Life Coaching, not to be confused as psychotherapy. Ages: adult (18 - elder). Female & male clients.
* Please note, Serious Mental Illnesses are NOT appropriate for Coaching (e.g. schizophrenia, paranoid psychotic disorders, etc)
* Always check with your medical provider before taking any supplement.
* Coaching sessions are not recognized/covered by insurance, but are covered by Flex Spending Accounts (FLEX) & Health Savings Accounts (HSA).